Devon Hunter

Last night I had a fantastic party at my place. Friends, family, and neighbors all came over to see my apartment, and we did some early birthday celebrating. I really felt surrounded by happiness. It wasn’t a housewarming as much as it was a heartwarming. I know some pretty fucking awesome people, and I hope you do as well.

I am writing this specifically for the people (friends, family, clients, acquaintances, readers, etc.) who have been calling, emailing, and texting. I have tried to reply to each individual, because I don’t want people worrying about me; however, it’s hard to keep up with the outpouring of support. It’s amazing to have so many people express that. It really is. Thank you!

I want you all to know, if you ever doubted it, that I am made of pretty strong stuff. I apologize if my recent blogging has created a “conversation” in the broader blogosphere that has upset you or caused you worry. I am doing perfectly fine, and I embrace you (even if I haven’t been able to say it to you directly).

It will be in other parties’ interest to make me look as bad as possible (in the eventuality of further action), but my testament is still posted here without revisions. Hopefully THAT tells you what you need to know. I wish you well, and thank you for your encouragement.

NOTE:

If you care to pose alternative observations to those I state on my blog, you are welcome and invited to submit your comments ON THE CONDITION THAT YOU REMAIN CIVIL. I have heard through friends that I am being criticized for not allowing more contrary discussion here. Let me be frank: This is MY blog, and it has a purpose. That purpose is not to allow anonymous strangers to vomit acid all over me. If you care to join the discussion from a different perspective, please do so with intelligence and a calm voice. If you recontextualize your comments within a framework of dialogue, rather than hysterical ranting, I will be quite happy to approve your comments.

NOTE: Sean Cody revealed my legal name, and they may release yours too!

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This is a three-part blog entry that will give background information about adult video projects and how they operate, so that others will have candid information before they decide that videos are the choice for them or not. I will be honest, and this means it will not be possible for me to sound completely unbiased in some instances. It isn’t my intent necessarily to besmirch anyone, but rather to describe events, so that possibilities aren’t overlooked (e.g. if it happened to me, it’s possible it will happen in a similar manner to you). In part 1, I am going to go line by line and describe the ins and outs of my experience with Sean Cody. In part 2, I am going to compare and contrast my experiences at the four houses for which I have worked thus far. In part 3, I am going to give some practical advice and talk about the advantages of working through an agency.

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Before you make any choices you can’t undo, ask yourself these questions:

1. Why do I want to do porn?
2. What will I gain by doing so, and how will I use this to my advantage?
3. How will it affect my life once I eventually retire?
4. Am I making any choices out of desparation?
5. Who can help me along the path?

Why porn?

There are a variety of answers. Tucker Vaughn knew when he was 16 that he wanted to do it – he was called to it. I don’t know whether he can articulate yet what this calling entailed, but he told me as soon as he saw porn that he knew it was what he wanted to do. As soon as he was of age he started, and he’s been a very busy boy ever since.

I have heard someone say he wanted to be preserved for posterity while he was at the peak of his fitness and male beauty.

I use porn as a free, ongoing form of advertising that I get paid to create. I am not a porn model who sometimes escorts. I am an escort who has done some porn modeling. That difference underlies the reason why I am free to speak so freely and honestly about my experience in the video industry: The threats that I “will never do videos again after that Sean Cody essay” fall flat, because I am doing more videos (tomorrow in fact), and I also don’t consider myself a “porn star.” If I do happen to go on to become a recognized persona in video, awesome. If not, okay.

Every man has his reason for going into the video industry. Know what yours is, and come to peace with it. Own your reason: You won’t be able to avoid telling people forever (if at all), and living with shame is not living.

To what advantage?

This question grows out of the first. Alright, you have decided that you have a reason that can be reconciled with your personal life (even after you stop doing video work): You are going to do adult video. Fine. Once you have identified why you want to do it, you should now consider what you gain from doing so. Let’s look more closely at the three examples from above under the “Why porn?” section.

Are you like Tucker? Do you plan to possibly make an extended career in the video industry? Will doing the porn pay for an education you otherwise couldn’t get, or will it help you understand later how to produce video projects of your own? I don’t know that this is Tucker’s plan, but that is what Christian Owen is doing. It has worked for others in this way, including Kristofer Weston. We are all attracted to our careers for reasons we don’t always understand at first. Do you just need to do porn? If so, know that you can use it in several ways, especially later for a career in production (which can last far longer than a modeling career).

It sounds like a relatively poorly considered reason to me, but doing porn to capture yourself at your prime is valid, I suppose. Couldn’t you just take a Polaroid? But it isn’t my place to judge. If this is your motivation, then pornography essentially forces you to remain in shape for as long as possible. If you are a body builder, does doing porn get you other gigs that help you maintain your life as a (semi-)professional exerciser? I don’t know. I can’t answer this, but I present it here, because I heard it touted as a reason to do porn.

Are you in my position, perhaps? It’s a very common scenario. A significant portion of the escorts I have seen in ads mention that they are also porn models. And let me clarify something while I’m thinking about it: I lose money (in the short term) by doing the shoots. I am paid for them, so the time isn’t lost; however, looking at a strictly dollars:effort ratio… Porn is definitely not my primary concern; however, I understand that the more I stand out, the better I may fare when it is time to connect with clients. But do not fool yourself: Porn (unless you have a series of contracts guaranteeing some regular gigs, paid at generous rates) generally will not support you as easily as a successful escorting practice.

And after?

There is no way to undo porn. Once you finish your video career you will have left behind you the proof of your profession. Before you go into this segment of the industry, you will need to consider what you will do later. Consider where your interests lie, and have a sense of direction when you begin the video career.

Pornography is a vehicle, if you steer it properly; however, there are some roads that will be closed to you. Which route will you navigate then?

Do not lose heart: Pornography is becoming more and more mainstream, and there are many people who simply don’t care if you are/were an adult entertainer. Between the liberalization of our culture and the bad economy, most people will probably end up saying, “Hey, you did what you had to.” You will probably not be able to run for governor (unless the current state of affairs amongst South Carolina’s governor and gubanatorial candidates becomes the norm everywhere).

So, you can forget about the careers where conservative appearances matter, but there are so many other options. I would also make another point: If you are entrepreneurial enough to be in adult entertainment, then you are probably possessed of stout enough heart to continue being independent later. What business would you like to start? I know porn models who have gone on to be landscape designers, accountants, lead mechanics, lawyers, and highly sought after tutors (though these latter two options seem a bit riskier to me, in terms of conflicts of interest).

I love being my own employer. I was miserable as an educator, office worker, and executive assistant. Although I do not have the security of a paycheck coming from a boss, I have so much more control over my destiny that it’s worth the exchange (since I have learned to tolerate the endless adventure). It is deeply satisfying to mold your efforts into your own visions, whatever they might be. Perhaps THAT is the answer to your “Why porn?” question: Use the money to set yourself up in a business as your own boss. When you do the background check on your past employment, you can just overlook the adult entertainment stuff.

Are you desparate?

If you are considering porn simply for fast cash… Well, honestly… You should probably not do it at all. I blogged quite a while back that you should never do anything that causes you guilt, grief, pain, sorrow, regret, or embarrassment. That is still true now.

Who can help you?

You need allies in this business. You need people who are on your side, who care where you are, and who will look out for your best interests. This career is not a choice for the squemish or undecided. Once you jump into this pool, little fishy, the wet footprints will follow you after you’re done swimming.

I want to reiterate what I said in part 2: You should NOT make any agreements or arrangements with recruiters who come looking for you through social networking and/or modeling sites. If someone approaches you, find out if they are recruiting FOR a particular house, of if they are recruiting FROM a particular house. Freelancers, to be frank, are often pirhannas. They do not care about you. They care only about their commissions. And why not? They’ve never met or spoken to you. Why and how should they give a damn if you are okay?

If you do accept work through a site like Model Mayhem (which is how I came to Sean Cody), be very certain that you have accepted work from a representative of the house itself. If you do not, you may find yourself owing a finder’s fee to a recruiter who has done no work, and who may try to claim 10-20% of your pay from every assignment you do at that house (and possibly other houses as well). If you accept an offer from the house directly, you do not have to worry about the recruiter, though you will still be on your own to figure out the contracts. Again, I suggest a reputable agent: An agent would have pointed out the intricacies of my Sean Cody contract.

Yes, there are horror stories about agents who have not done their jobs, and who have ended up cheating or hurting their models. There are agents who don’t call, agents who lie, and others who are flakes. And so I do not come to you saying, “You should get an agent,” and then NOT have one to whom I can refer you.

Without a doubt (and for very good reasons) the staff at Fabscout are easily among the most respected booking agents in gay porn. They have arranged all the assignments I have done since my Sean Cody contract expired, and they have made everything very easy. If you cannot work through Fabscout, then look for an agent who will do everything Fabscout does for me:

1. Contacts you regularly with work – this means the agent is well-connected and proactive.
2. Offers you assignments without pressuring you to take work you do not want – avoid people who try to coerce you to do anything you do not know you are willing to do.
3. Shields you from bareback porn companies – although you can go from condom to bareback, you very often cannot go from bareback to condom. Aside from exposing yourself to risk, you may cut your nose off to spite your face by doing bareback porn.
4. Acts promptly and responsibly on all project details, including transportation, lodging, wardrobe requirements, general appearance guidelines, and fees.
5. Works only with video companies they know to be safe – report problems to your agent, so that they can help you, if needed.
6. Checks to make sure you are en route – this establishes that you are safe, and lets the house know you are definitely on your way.
7. Calls or texts while you are on set to be certain you are happy – this gives you the security of knowing that someone knows where you are, and it holds the house accountable for your comfort and safety.
8. Negotiates with the house and communicates with you about the fee schedule – you should know up front how much you will be paid and what will be required for you to receive your check.
9. Charges a reasonable rate – Fabscout charges me 20%, and I am happy to give it to them. Fabscout is rather like the AAA of gay porn. I don’t mind paying them, because when I need them they are there. Do not pay 20% to an agency that doesn’t match all this effort. Expect to pay more toward 10-15%/project if you sign an on-going contract, rather than working shoot to shoot.
10. Sends an invoice in writing and keeps accurate records – this ensures that everyone knows how much is owed and paid.

Conclusion

Writing this series has been quite the wild ride. I have no regrets. But I do not believe in regret. There are only lessons learned. As you go forward in your Adult Entertainment career, it is imperative that you pay attention. You must take care of yourself, but that doesn’t mean you have to victimize others to protect your interests. I suggest you work sober, treat your appointments, club bookings, and/or shoots with an ethic that will defy the stereotypes associated with the industry, and live from a position of as much transparency as possible. Own your choices, and do not be afraid to speak out when you know you have experienced something that others should be warned against. Even if I have never met you, I want you to know that you can email me, if you need an empathetic response to a question pertaining to your experiences as a purveyor of fantasy and pleasure.

NOTE: Sean Cody revealed my legal name, and they may release yours too!

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This is a three-part blog entry that will give background information about adult video projects and how they operate, so that others will have candid information before they decide that videos are the choice for them or not. I will be honest, and this means it will not be possible for me to sound completely unbiased in some instances. It isn’t my intent necessarily to besmirch anyone, but rather to describe events, so that possibilities aren’t overlooked (e.g. if it happened to me, it’s possible it will happen in a similar manner to you). In part 1, I am going to go line by line and describe the ins and outs of my experience with Sean Cody. In part 2, I am going to compare and contrast my experiences at the four houses for which I have worked thus far. In part 3, I am going to give some practical advice and talk about the advantages of working through an agency.

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There are people who want to dismiss me, because I’m ”just a whore.” I would point out that I have a Mission Statement, and I am writing this particular three-part entry FOR POTENTIAL PORN MODELS.

The extreme (but not unexpected) backlash I am getting from Sean Cody/gay-for-pay supporters boils down to this: Our desires are very intimate, and they reside in a place very close the core of our identities. My whistle blowing isn’t the problem, in and of itself. The problem for them is that I have done something that undermines their fantasy that these straight men ENJOY gay sex. But that is impossible. Straight men cannot enjoy gay sex any more than gay men can enjoy straight sex. If you enjoy both, then you are bisexual. This gay-for-pay “ideal” isn’t tenable when you really scrutinize it. My showing that their fear is true (that the models do it for the money only) attacks their fantasy, and they take it as a personal criticism (which on some levels it is). I think it would not only be healthier, but also more pragmatic, to desire the people who are capable of giving you as much as you give them.

I have found that if my intuition tells me something, I should listen to it. You have to treat your fantasy life with as much care as your reality, because they are interconnected. If you are conflicted, address the conflict.

I wrote the first portion of this blog knowing that it would upset some people. But this is how change happens. In some tiny way, I hope that I am contributing to the eventual withering of gay-for-pay options in the LGBTQ Adult Entertainment community. There are a great many people saying a great many hurtful comments (and making assertions based on being acquainted with me through +3 degrees of separation and speaking as if they know me), but I know that my truth is as valuable as anyone else’s.

(A side note to people who now “hate” me: Your hatred will never silence me. Ever. The tone of this blog will not be changed by your conscious and purposeful dedication to ignorance of how gay-for-pay pornography undermines you as a gay man. I’m sorry, but that’s what spinach tastes like to children.)

Now, this entry will compare and contrast (for the benefit of models considering which, if any, companies to choose) the shooting styles and on-set cultures of Sean Cody (SC), COLT/Buckshot (CB), Falcon (F), and HotHouse (HH). I am going to look at Recruitment Issues, Travel/Accommodations, Shooting, On-Set Culture, and Gay-Affirmative Attitudes (whether in the presence of gay-for-pay models or not).

Recruitment

Most video companies will have a link somewhere on their pages that is called “Become a Model,” or something to that effect. Before you click it, please consider waiting until I have written part 3 of this blog (The Advantages of an Agent). There’s a lot going on in the background before you even arrive, and you have to be certain you are ready. I cannot suggest strongly enough that you NOT work with anonymous recruiters who approach you randomly on sites like Model Mayhem. NEVER AGREE TO ANYTHING WITH SOMEONE YOU HAVE NOT MET OR CONVERSED WITH AT LENGTH, ESPECIALLY NOT IN WRITING/EMAIL. BE YOUR OWN AGENT OR HIRE A PROFESSIONAL.

If you decide to contact the site directly, you should completely and honestly fill out all the information they request. You will do yourself no favors in being dishonest. Do not misrepresent yourself. If you are not willing to participate in various activities, then do not say you are (e.g. Saying you will allow yourself to be fucked and then refusing to do so is a waste of time, money, and energy for everyone involved and could result in your developing a reputation as being difficult to work with). For my part, I will kiss, exchange oral, and exchange anal (with condoms). I am very specific that I will not do heavy bondage, fisting, and other fetishes. Tell them who you are and what you can do.

You should be prepared with pictures to submit. They do not have to be professional, and probably should NOT be professional. The houses want to know what YOU look like, not what you look like after Photoshop. Most sites will want some or all of the following to accompany your application: Shots of your upper body from the front, left, right, and back. Shots of your lower body (nude usually) from the front, left, right, and back. They may or may not request pictures of your penis (usually erect, when requested at all), and you should include pics from the front, left, and right. They will probably request photographs of your ass, so make sure you get left, right, and back. Make sure the images are well-lighted, or you will have to repeat this process until you send photographs they can actually see. Sending dark pictures implies you are trying to hide blemishes.

To ensure success, approach the sites that use models who are similar to you. You will be discouraged, perhaps unnecessarily, by rejection from sites that do not use your look. Get in where you fit in.

Travel/Accommodations

It is routine for the house in question to pay the cost of your travel. You should expect the company to purchase your travel, cover your hotel, and provide a per diem for food (usually about $20/day). They should also cover any transportation you need to and from the airport, to and from the shoot location, and to and from the hotel when you are traveling for the purposes of the shoot itself.

Different companies go to different lengths in this regard. SC picked me up in a limousine and put me up in a 5-star resort hotel. SC also provided continental breakfast that included a very impressive buffet, and they also took me to very nice restaurants (of my choice) after the shoots were completed. CB, F, and HH sent drivers in their personal cars (which were all safe and comfortable), provided hotel accommodation, and paid per diems.

DO NOT WORK FOR A COMPANY WHICH EXPECTS YOU TO PAY FOR TRAVEL/ACCOMMODATION OR SEEKS TO REIMBURSE THEMSELVES FOR IT FROM YOUR FEE.

Shooting

Each company is pretty distinct from the others in this regard. Before you apply to a company to be a model, watch some of their videos and learn what you can about their processes. In particular, pay attention to how often the camera changes angles. Every time the angle changes there is the possibility that a take ended. The more often the angle changes, the more takes are required, the more staging will be necessary, and the more likely the chance for exhaustion.

SC duos require 6-8 hours, and the number of takes is rather staggering. This is reflected in the way the cameras bounce from spot to spot throughout the film. If you are going to be the receptive partner for a SC video, do so knowing that it will be long day. The product itself will be highly polished, and it will be delivered to a huge audience; however, SC pays far more than other houses, likely because their shooting days are long. Expect each take to last between 15 seconds and 2 minutes (with breaks in between).

CB has a variety of aesthetics. For the scene in which I participated, shooting lasted an hour or two, and we used only one or two condoms. The camera operators walked around us, and there were additional cameras on stands. Our takes lasted considerably longer, some of them lasting several minutes. Expect a very high production value from CB (SC work is beautifully produced, too). COLT is one of the premier producers of gay erotica, and there is a reason for it: They make stunning work.

(A side note: Although I have never worked with Randy Blue, I did my CB scene with Topher Dimaggio who has. He told me that at Randy Blue he never experienced a shoot that lasted longer than 3 hours. This included the time necessary for taking still shots.)

Falcon is another top-notch team with whom I enjoyed working. If you work with F you can also count on a very polished product. They make gorgeous movies. The scene I shot with them took about two to three hours to complete, required approximately 10 condoms, and was accompanied by a great deal more shooting of introductory material. Although there were more separate penetrations for this scene, Benjamin Bradley was so adept as an insertive partner that I was never uncomfortable.  SC required very little introductory material. CB recorded only a few moments of Topher and I hugging as an introductory image to our scene, but F created a scenario in which I was cruising Benjamin at the beach and started a conversation as a means of introducing our scene.

HH was a great deal of fun, and they produce high quality videos. Their movies are just plain HAWT. Their live show I shot didn’t intimidate me, because I’d done so much cam modeling prior to the scene with Lucas Knowles. If you are going to do the Backroom for HH, you will probably be asked to do a live cam show and one or two pre-recorded scenes for later distribution. I suggest practicing your live skills with a webcam in a chat room. It will make it easier to absorb the idea that there are many eyes watching you. The takes for HH were similar to those of F. They didn’t last as long as the CB takes, but they were longer than those for SC. My scene with Conner O’Reilly took about three to four hours.

On-Set Culture

At SC, I got the distinct sense from beginning to end that the staff was overworked and burned out. Everything felt routine, as if they were all saturated by the cut-and-dry nature of the process. Everyone seemed tired before we began, and people seemed short-tempered. I felt more tension at SC than at the other houses. Another peculiarity I experienced at SC that I did not observe at the other houses: For the solo shoots, the staff leave the room where the scene is taking place as you fluff yourself, and then come running in with their cameras once you holler out that you are ready with an erection. At the other houses you simply fluff yourself while people wait to begin again.

The shoot for CB required more set up, because it was out on location. SC sets are mostly pre-assembled (and thus used repeatedly – you should recognize all the “rooms” by now on the SC site). Whereas SC generally uses one of a few sets that are always ready, CB, F, and HH may or may not venture out into new locations. While the CB shoot took longer to set up, the shoots themselves were shorter than at SC. Overall the length of the days was about the same as a result.

For the F shoot we were also on location, and so, like CB, there was more set up than with SC; however, just as with CB, there was a sense that the production crew ENJOYED working with each other. There was a great deal of levity on the F set, as there was at CB (both sets were decidedly warm and friendly). John Bruno of F laughs and jokes a great deal, and the other staff were fun and courteous as well. If you ever get the chance to work with Kristofer Weston or John Rutherford of CB, I can tell you that they are simply delightful.

The scene at HH felt as close to a hook up as any shoot I’ve done yet, partly because Conner O’Reilly is so easy to work with (very cute!), but also because Christian Owen and his staff were organized without being jaded. They use the same sets repeatedly (in addition to constructing sets for special projects), just as SC does. The HH shoot took a bit longer than we’d originally anticipated, but there was never any sense that anyone at HH was losing patience.

Expect each of these four houses to take time for solo photography to use as promotional materials. When you negotiate your fee (see part 3), understand that all of these houses will cover your travel and accommodation, and that the fee will probably include one or two 2 to 4 hour-photo shoots, as well as the scene(s) in which you will be participating. All four houses take exceptionally good still shots, and take great pains with lighting and composition. SC and HH required less time for the still shots, because they occurred on familiar sets.

Gay-Affirmative Attitudes

I have made clear my experience with SC in this regard.

On the remaining shoots I have done, there was never any expression of concern that I, or anyone else, was “too gay.” If you work for CB, F, or HH you probably won’t have to worry about anyone obsessing that you might accidentally be seen as gay-for-real, rather than gay-for-pay. These houses also work with gay-for-pay models, but their attitude toward LGBTQ people isn’t negative at all. In fact, CB used a transgender MTF to do our hair and makeup. I fear; however, that my experience with SC may have infected me with some homophobia, because on the shoots for CB, F, and HH I was worried the whole time that my sounds were ridiculous. I have to unlearn that.

Conclusion

Regardless of the house(s) with which you work, you should acquaint yourself with their videos. Do you want to be portrayed in the manner and style for which the company is known? I prefer the idea of doing higher-budget projects, thus I have politely rejected work from companies whose work looks amateur. I have also made the personal choice not to participate in productions in which a “straight” man is “tricked” into having gay sex, so I have also politely declined work from those companies who feature it. Consider your brand and image, and do not dilute them by doing scenes which are not consistent with them.

With the issues of brand, and more importantly, health in mind, I cannot state it strongly enough: Avoid doing bareback porn. Politely decline every request you get. There are many obvious (and subtle) pitfalls to doing bareback porn, and there is no need to ennumerate them all. Do not do raw porn! EVER! NO no no no no no no no no no no no, no no no no no no no. NO! Do not do it!

One last suggestion: If you want to work with SC, work with them FIRST. They will not generally use models who have already gotten exposure on other sites. They want “virgins.” SC offers the highest pay, as they should, given the length of their shoots, the exclusive contracts (which do not include guarantees for further work), and the limitations the exclusive contract will place on any other adult themed projects you may wish to persue.

OMG! So I know that not everything in work is always going to be perfect, but I am SO FREAKING GLAD I’m out from under the contract with the stupid Sean Cody site and the latent (re: patent?) homophobia on their sets. Doing COLT/Buckshot and Falcon is so much better for me personally. I met my scene partner for HotHouse this weekend, and I am really looking forward to that now. The crew for COLT and Falcon are relaxed and friendly, and they don’t act like a bunch of burnt out, impatient, jaded assholes. We joke and play around on set. As I suspected, working with gay models is infinitely more conducive to doing good porn, and I have to say that I really appreciate Topher Dimaggio and Benjamin Bradley NOT treating my asshole like a vagina (take a hint, Sean Cody: you don’t HAVE to drill for oil in 4-6 yoga positions in EVERY scene). GOD!

Anyway, Benjamin is a very warm, funny, and sweet guy. Some people warned me that he or his boyfriend, Roman Heart, would be cold/stuck-up diva-bitches. But I didn’t find that to be true AT ALL. I would totally work with either of them anytime they wanted. They are very kind guys who happen to be known by alot of people (and thus opened to alot of unfair criticism). It reminds me of the blog entry I wrote a while back entitled -1 + 1 = 0.

So, in September or so, look for a DVD release with all our shining faces: Benjamin Bradley, Roman Heart, Devon Hunter, Lucas Knowles (yay, yay for HotHouse live shows… hint, hint), Parker London, Tucker Vaughn, et al. I hope you are having a fantastic beginning to your new week!

In light of what is happening with Rekers there are a great many conversations out there dominated by people who should shut the fuck up.

“Escorting is a livelihood, not a career.”

Oh, really? Well, look who knows so much.

Let’s take a moment to evaluate whether or not escorting is a career. A career is that work one does for which one is paid, and it is generally supported by personal investment, training, expertise, and networking. I would like to address each of these in turn as a proof that although escorting can be “only” a livelihood, it can also be a full-fledged career.

Personal Investment

As Dolly Parton said, “It costs a lot of money to look this cheap.” Let me just tell you what I have to pay in order to play the part. Equivocate this to paying for college if you will; however, know that careers generally involve a huge investment on an individual’s part, and adult entertainment is no exception. This is what it costs me to maintain the Devon Hunter brand:

1. Personal training at $40/hour, 2-3 times/week
2. High quality food at $100 – $150/week
3. Products from Aveda (because you may was well eat what you put on your skin) at $150/month
4. Therapeutic massage to break down muscle and remove toxins at $65/hour, 1-2 times/week
5. Supplements such as vitamins and muscle maintenance at $125/month

If you want me to keep looking like I look, it’s going to cost me about $1500/month. At about $18,000/year, that is a college education. This doesn’t include the in-kind spa services that a friend treats me to (I probably got $500 worth of hair coloring, teeth bleaching, and face peeling yesterday). I am investing in my profession, so that I can remain competitive in a glutted market. I have to offer what employers want. Period.

Training

I cannot speak for all escorts, but the best among us study and train. We hire at first, in order to emulate, or associate with high quality escorts who help us avoid pitfalls. We learn a code of conduct. We talk to people who hire escorts to understand the culture of the interactions. We are honed into the equivalent of courtesans in Europe and geisha in Japan. We are artists with a variety of techniques and skills of many types and purposes. I happen to be a very vocal and open escort (concerning my thoughts and my humanity), but you are naïve if you think my experiences differ all that much from any others’. There is a process to becoming an escort. Any tramp can be a two-bit whore who throws his legs in the air for $20 with 10 minutes notice. It take time and skill to be what we are. Art is what makes it look easy.

Expertise

Every career has a set of skills unique to it which require a submission of the self to the technique. It goes without saying that a skilled escort will have honed his expertise for a particular group of clients. I happen to focus on the Boyfriend Experience (BFE). It’s what I like, and it is what I would want for myself. And that makes it easy for me to offer, and it makes it pleasurable for me to give. I would be a terrible fetish escort. I would fail at it. It isn’t my area of expertise. I am very gifted at emotional and personal connections. I am good at it. Other escorts have learned the safety issues and refined practices for whatever it is they do (e.g. S/M, B/D, water sports, extreme play, etc.). They practice their skills and learn the body. We, all of us, learn about people in intimate ways that rival the intricacies of professionals in other fields. And we charge professional fees accordingly. If you want a two-bit fuck, then go pay $20 for one. They are available, and it might be what you need. But… If you want an experience that goes beyond this… Well, you pay for that too.

Networking

Whether it be through advertising, introductions at social events, or any other method of contact, a professional escort has to build and maintain a network. The best escorts see the same clients over and over and over and over. Why? Because we’re professionals! In whatever industry you are in, how much of your sales come from established accounts, and what would happen to you if you were not to maintain those relationships? It should go without saying that professional adult entertainers of all types are highly organized, savvy, and professional people. My rant here doesn’t make me less of a professional, in my opinion. I would equate this entry to making the outside world privy to the break room banter that I would have with any other professional in my industry when something is vexing us.

You have just witnessed what I would say to any escort or exotic dancer when some stupid ass tells me that my profession is “only” a livelihood.