Devon Hunter

Dear Devon,

As you pursue your new full time career, please know that you are not doing anything wrong… I do not think you are, nor do I think I am wrong for hiring escorts… Also, consider hiring escorts yourself and enjoying them, so that you are learning to be the best you can be. Good luck to you!

T

Dear T -

I definitely believe in fostering Good. And that’s a philosophical point I’ve written about: The difference between encouraging Good and doing Right. To me, Good is eternal – it goes beyond us as individuals. It is what it is, without regard to time and place. On the other hand, Right changes based on the culture/person that is examining how best to accomplish Good.

No matter the time, place, or person, Good is universal (e.g. Love). However, totally dependent on time, place, and person is Right (e.g. cultural mores that regulate sexuality). What is Right to one person may not be Right to another. For example, Boston 2009 does NOT have the same sense of Right as Boston 1709. Boston, in both times, is full of people who want to encourage Good, but this same place at different times has very different ideas about Right and how it leads to Good. Do you actually think a sect of Puritans would get away with hanging 21 people for “witchcraft” in this day and age? The Puritans thought they were Right. So did Hitler. So did the Inquisition. So did the Aztecs. So do the terrorists. In trying to encourage the ideal that is Good, they tried to do what they thought was Right. And that’s the problem: I think people should encourage Good. I do not think people should do Right. Good is for everyone, but Right is only for a privileged few (and who wants that? BLAH!).

And that is the point I want to make: I am totally comfortable that I am encouraging Good in making my transition into this full time career. Affection and respect encourage Good. I provide (without guilt or shame) a service that is desparately needed. We are integrated beings, and if we do not have outlets for our passions/emotions, we die (literally and figuratively). We cannot separate our desire from our selves/ourselves. They are part of a whole. I give people, who many not otherwise have the option, a chance to connect to that deep well of satisfaction. How is that not Good?

And it’s funny you would mention learning by hiring: I am quite honored to brag that Sean Knight (www.seanknightxxx.com) is my mentor. I talk to him daily, we travelled together in Florida all last week (and will be travelling together again in NYC the first week of September), and I am soaking up everything he feels inclined to share. You see… I used to be an educator. I know it’s better to learn from an expert, rather than reinvent the wheel. So… I am already totally invested in doing an “apprenticeship,” and I’ve been lucky enough to make friends/colleagues with one of the best in the US. Sean has already helped me more than I could ever truly repay. He and I have a bond that is friendly, generous, and respectful.

At any rate, I hope this didn’t go on too long. I look forward to hearing your thoughts as to whether or not the October visit is something you would like to commit to. Be well, and I will talk with you soon.

Devon

It was brought to my attention that there are sites that do nothing but discuss the material that is generated at places like Sean Cody, Corbin Fisher, and Randy Blue. What’s more, it was brought to my attention that people can respond to those critiques/discussions. There are so many opinions out there… It’s pretty amazing how much they can differ from person to person or site to site. It’s also amazing the extent to which some people try to invade the privacy of others.

What I have read essentially brings me to balance: There are at least 15 sites I have found that have discussed and/or reviewed my solo at Sean Cody. This was not something I’d thought to consider before I did it. It never occurred to me that there were full-time movie critics and peanut galleries for Sean Cody; however, these not only exist, they proliferate in large numbers. And that is what is interesting: I am only one person, and yet some of the responses I elicited from people were as divergent as you could possibly imagine.

Some people were revolted at the thought of me being gay and 32 years old. Others liked me specifically because of it. There were as many comments that I was fugly as there were that I was gorgeous. All of the reviews themselves were glowing, but it was the conversations that followed that could be startling. And yet, after all that reading, what I have finally accepted is that I am who I am, and that’s going to just have to be good enough.

So, although some people have called me a pasty grub and others have called me a creamy boystud; and although some have called me a nelly gay-faced homo, while others refer to me as a hot gay jock; and whereas there are people who think me ancient and/or decrepit, there are others who applaud me for admitting my age (which makes me seem, to them, even more youthful); and since in the same conversation there are people who think I am nothing arguing along side of people who think I am everything… What all this essentially means is that all the negatives are cancelled out by positives, and I’m left right where I was before: Me.

And that’s not such a bad scenario.

Dear Devon,

By the time you read this I will be gone. We’ve been together so long, that it hurts me to leave you. I want you to know that I’ll always be there waiting. Even if it’s only in your memories. You don’t need me anymore, so I have to say goodbye.

You turned 33 yesterday (excuse me, 24 for the ninth time). It was an amazingly beautiful day in Charlotte, NC. The sun was bright, but not scalding. The sky was such a dark blue. That delicious breeze was warm and soft. Just perfect. The Goddess couldn’t have sent better weather to celebreate the most important day of your year. And what a great start you had: The mechanics fixed the car for free, you spent time with some good friends, and then you ate some nice food. I enjoyed sitting there watching you, my hand on your shoulder. I have enjoyed touching you so deeply. I was sure that we’d be together forever. But yesterday something changed.

Last night your solo video for Sean Cody was debuted. On your birthday no less! How the fates do it… I just don’t know. But that video clip, and the stills from it, have ruined any chance we have of being together. What is even more shocking to me is how easily you let me just slip away. As if I’d never been a part of your life. That hurt. To be dismissed so suddenly. So absolutely. So definitively. And for what? Porn!

You were so overjoyed with the images. I admit: There’s not much fault I can find in them (and you know I can find fault in just about anything: I like to think it makes me practical, and I’m sorry you’ve never seemed to agree). And that’s when I realized that everything I was saying to you was bypassing your hearing and thinking. I was completely erased for about 30 minutes. It was as if I were speaking Farsi to a total stranger. You didn’t even give me a glance.

That is unacceptable.

I cannot tolerate being looked over every time you find success. You have always listened to me, and I have always been there, whenever you were downcast or alone. Whenever you felt like you couldn’t go on anymore, who was it that was standing there? Me. It was me. I deserve better. Each time you are happy you immeditaely put me aside. I am so sick of it.

So now you will have to continue on without me. It has been a long road. But I am not willing to sit idly by while you zoom down the highway of your life. There are others out there who will be glad to give me a ride. They will embrace me. They will never let go of me. These are the potential hosts who will let me into their homes, hearts, and minds. They will make me feel welcome. They will look at you as if you were a fool to let me go. But I am leaving for now. Whenever you feel lonely, just rememeber that I will always be happy to come back to you.

Love,

Doubt

This week I’m in Washington, D.C. helping with various Pride activities to which I committed myself. Last night was an event I’d not originally planned on being part of, but I’m really excited I got to be here nonetheless. Last night Dr. Terry, the man behind the FUK!T campaign, hosted a fundraiser here at The Artists’ Inn Residence for an organization that is planning to open a permenant museum for LGBTQ history that will be opening in the capital soon. The guest of honor was Frank Kameny, one of the single most important figures in the Gay Rights movement of the United States.

Dr. Frank Kameny is one of those people about whom not enough is said, especially by younger LGBTQ people who (through little fault of their own) know almost nothing about their community’s history. Kameny is one of the first, if not THE first, full time Gay Liberation activists. He holds a doctorate in astronomy from Harvard, and was fired in the 1950′s from his federal job for being homosexual. Kameny immediately began writing letters and protested his dismissal to the Supreme Court. He began picketing and protesting in front of the White House and Pentagon years prior to the Stonewall Riots of 1969 in New York City. When you see 1960′s era black and white footage of people marching on the sidewalks in D.C. in support of LGBTQ rights, that is film of Kameny and his friends/allies.

And I got to meet him! IN PERSON! OMG! It’s the equivalent of meeting Rosa Parks or Martin Luther King, Jr. It’s like meeting Susan B. Anthony or César Chávez. This is a big deal! I can’t believe it… I was punch crazy all night – I’d not been drinking, but I was excited, giggly, energetic… And then I realized something: This is what Pride feels like. HAPPY PRIDE!

Hello everyone! It’s absolutely gorgeous today in Washington, D.C.!! I love Dupont Circle on a pretty day (yes, I love the Fruit Loop). I hope this finds you well. Below is the link I promised for the story I wrote for Matt Comer’s blog at www.InterstateQ.com. The essay I wrote is part 5 of 5, but when you go to Matt’s page you will find the links for the first four installments at the bottom of the page.

Happy Memorial Day weekend!