I was asked in a private email by someone not yet in exotic dancing about ideas for keeping money and belongings safe while at work. Here are some possibilities for you to consider. You will have to adjust them to work for your personal situation.

1. Lockers – This is the obvious choice. The pro is that you can keep your valuables and personal effects locked securely. The cons are that they may be either too big or too small for your needs, or if they get damaged, you lose the key, or forget your combo there’s no easy way to retrieve your belongings. Also, if you travel, you will have to remember to remove everything in your locker into a duffle before you leave work. This situation is best if you dance on an on-going basis in the same venue. Don’t count on these: Most venues don’t supply them.
2. Duffle/Gym bag – Many brands of bags have doubled zippers with small holes in the ends of the zipper tabs. You could get extra small padlocks. The pros are that you can carry your belongings from venue to venue around with you prepacked, and you can fill your bag with everything you need while remaining mobile. The cons are that someone else can walk off with the bag and simply cut it open later. Also you can over-pack and end up with a very burdensome load. This is best when there aren’t lockers and/or when you are visiting a club without plans to stay for more than a night or two.
3. Envelopes/Mini safes – You could put your name on an envelope or keep a little cash box at the bar if you trust the bartender or a friend more than you trust the other performers. I wouldn’t make a big deal of it if you do this, because of what I’m about to mention next…
4. Trust – In my experience there isn’t really all that much theft. In all the time I’ve been doing this I’ve known of only two incidents of someone having their money stolen (in all the other cases the money had been misplaced or miscounted) and one incident of someone having their clothes stolen. In all those situations the people who got their stuff stolen were the ones who made the biggest deal out of not trusting their colleagues. Ha! Generally I’ve found that there’s quite a bit of honor amongst thieves. LOL (Sorry, that probably wasn’t as funny as I think it is.) Pay attention – don’t let yourself be taken advantage of, but also don’t contribute to a self-fulfilling prophecy. The pro is that your coworkers will probably respect you. The con is that you might be wrong.
5. Don’t bring much. The pros are that you don’t have to keep up with much and you don’t have to worry about your belongings being lost or stolen. The cons are that you will probably end up with only the outfit you’re wearing under your clothes, and you might have to ask to borrow something from someone else (who may not be willing/able to accomodate you). But you can keep your money in your pocket or shoes (which you should do in the case of #2 and #4 also). That might be fine. It might not. You know your situation.

NOTE: Consider going to your car after work in groups of 2 or 3, or get an escort to your ride. It can be dangerous to leave work alone. People know that dancers carry alot of cash right after work. You should worry more about muggers and patrons than other performers. If you have to leave alone, PAY ATTENTION. Get to your ride quickly, and lock the door promptly upon sitting down. I do not advise dawdling to talk outside the club after work. You make yourself vulnerable as a traget for robbery.

Dear Devon,

So what’s the deal with go-go boys wearing those bands up around the top of their biceps?  What’s that all about?

-Eli

Hey Eli,

The bands above the biceps 1) are a place to be tipped if touching other parts of the body isn’t allowed  2) are a place to keep tips if your underwear gets too full (and looks like a baggy diaper or the money starts poking/rubbing badly) 3) advertise that others are tipping you 4) accentuate the shape of your arm, if you’re big enough to be accentuated 5) serve as an accesory for some outfits 6) provide an alternate site for tipping for those who don’t want to touch a dancer anywhere else 7) give patrons an excuse to feel up an entertainer’s arms (ha!).

Hope this helps! I have several pairs in various colors. If you want to get any for jogging (or for your own exotic dancing adventures,
try this online store). If they disable the link to the bands on that site, try going to the following blog and finding the link for armbands in my earlier entry about high-end clothing for booty shaking. You can click the photos with this entry to see my red ones in greater detail (oh, and don’t ask about that second pic – some moments simply beg to be captured… and then made fun of. I’ve had a few people put LOL captions on that image – FUNNY!).

I’ve become obsessed over the last two weeks by a particularly beautiful pendant, which is set in silver and has an engraved back. It’s by John Hardy. The Naga Lava line is quite exquisite (click to enlarge). I love the alternating black and blue or red sapphires. I’m tired of this object invading my thoughts and my dreams. I’ve “decided” to splurge, even though I’m feeling stressed out about the potential later for money issues. I’ve replaced a large portion of my wardrobe lately (after not buying new clothes for almost 10 years I looked fairly ridiculous when I dressed in anything other than my gym clothes). Because of that I’m feeling a bit panicky.

However, it’s really pretty, plus it’s ON SALE! So although I know I’ll probably lament it later (but not too much, I hope), I’m going to go ahead and spoil myself a little this holiday season. Yes, I’ve just bought clothes, but those will end up lasting me another decade probably. HA! This will last even longer. I know it’s a superfluous purchase, but I’m tired of always being so practical. I’m the ant quite enough. I’m going to be the grasshopper for once. Besides I can put some money down on it, and pay off the balance in 12 months at 0% APR. How’s THAT for a nice deal?

Shit… I’m having a crisis over sapphires… I’m so gay. There will probably be a part two to this story… and a part three to this story as well.

So, now that you wanna be a strippa and you’ve gotten through the audition… what do you take with you to work?? Here’s some helpful stuff to keep in your duffle/gear bag: A change of several thongs/underwear, an extra pair of socks, at least a second choice for footwear, armbands, breath spray/mints, deodorant, a large towel, Neutrogena sesame oil (avoid baby oil or any other product that contains mineral oil – see “Oily Strippers Work My Nerves!” for more info about this), gel hand sanitizer, baby wipes, cologne/body spray, hair product/brush, concealer (a type of makeup that you put on to cover up zits) and powder that match your skin tone, a travel size sewing kit that includes needles and thread, and business cards (if you make them out you’ll have them ready and available when someone wants your info for other events – you can print your own at home).

In my last post I made the point that you should look your best and wear nice clothes. I can’t stress enough how important it is to create the image you want, both in terms of your behavior and in terms of your appearance. However, if you don’t know where to find nice stuff, then it’s rather unhelpful of me to tell you to go get something you can’t find. Here are some sites and brands that are particularly attractive and flattering on stage:

Skiviez and DealbyEthan.com – Are online stores that have many different designer brands in one place. Of particular interest are 2x-ist, Calvin Klein, Gigo, and Ginch Gonch. Register with them – they will send you information on sales.

Guess? – Guess? makes some truly fantastic low-rise, slim fit jeans in a variety of washes. The Falcon line is particularly flattering. You can’t tell it from the pics on their website, but Falcon will make your thighs, crotch, and butt virtually pop. Falcon is what I’m wearing in the picture of me doing a pushup on the rocks by the river. They are part of the premier Guess? collection. Normal price is about $140. Look on Ebay if that is out of your budget. Remember, however, that your clothes are an investment, and they will repay dividends.

Vizeau - This site has some absolutely beautiful bathing suits. They are high fashion, and will cost you between $25-$75, depending on style. Click the pic at the left to see their one-leg thong in better detail.

Nike – Nike makes a tiny, soft arm band that is stretchy, and is a great place to put tips. It’s official name is the Nike Dri-FIT Bicep Arm Band. They come in about 10 colors. I have black, navy, white, and red. They also make crimson, green, brown, and purple. There are others. I have a variety, so that my arm bands can match/contrast my outfit. I need some green or brown ones to go with my camouflage gear… hmm… Regular price on them is about $8, but if you go to a Nike outlet store you can find them on sale sometimes for only $1. As of today this site has them, but I can’t promise they always will: Arm Band

Rufskin – Oh my freaking God!!!!! I LOVE these jeans… you have GOT to see them to believe them! They range from $100-$150. I got a pair of the Charly and a pair of the Hustler and they are bananas! They really are sexy. I want a pair of the Cody and the River (see at right, click to enlarge) as well.